Do More Good, Better

An Unexpected Gift

A few years ago, a friend of our work reached out to me on the phone in early October. He had been following our work for years, always spoke kindly about it, but had never made a financial investment.

As we talked he started asking me questions about how The Hope Effect was doing financially at the moment. More specifically, he wanted to know how GivingTuesday was shaping up.

I told him of our progress in securing matching donors, what the funding was going to be used for in the coming year, and what early indicators were showing us. This was going to be the biggest ask and biggest goal in our GivingTuesday history.

He listened intently, nodded along verbally, and said he'd been meeting with his accountant and was looking for the right opportunity.

The Joys Of A Finished Project

I grew up watching Bob Vila and This Old House. He became a role model for me and an introduction into the world of construction. Being the only son my dad naturally included me in house repairs around the house. Then when I was 12 he bought me a torch, solder, some copper pipes and a Bob Vila book on how to do plumbing. Together we converted our house to copper lines then we tackled the drain lines converting them to ABS and PVC.

After getting married we bought a 100 year old house. I cut my teeth on tiling, wiring, and carpentry as we remodeled every square inch of that house. It was somewhere in that timeframe that I told my friend, "I want to build my own house someday."

Discovering the Other Side of the Budget

Earlier this month I was talking with a colleague from my first real leadership assignment. We were on staff together at a church in Omaha, running the student ministry department. We got to laughing about how we operated back then.

We joked that we were like the defense department. Every budget season we marched to the elder board, made our case for resources, and walked away with what we needed to blow things up. We were excellent at inspiring the board to allocate resources. We were also excellent at spending it. Passionate about it, even. However, what we never thought about was where the money was coming from.

Then I became the lead pastor of a new church plant in Arizona. Time to build my first budget and present it to the elder board. No problem. I had done this many times and was basically an expert by now. I did what any resourceful leader does. I found the old budget templates from my previous church, changed the name at the top, and got to work.

That is when I noticed something.

Today is my 32nd wedding anniversary.

Christie and I got married when we were young. I was 21 years old and she was old enough to vote, but not able to legally have champagne at the wedding. A gentleman never reveals his wife's age or weight. Of course I thought I knew what I needed in a spouse back then. I was confident and resolute in my choice. However, after thirty-two years I can tell you with certainty I was as green as they come.

That said, marrying her is the best leadership decision I have ever made. This might sound like an odd way to put it. But I mean it exactly that way.

One of the biggest leadership decisions you will ever make is who you marry.

Not the job you take. Not the org you build. Not the degree you earn or the mentor you find. Who you come home to every single night will shape your leadership more than any of those things combined. I have watched this play out in the lives of friends and peers for three decades. The ones who married well lead better. Not always. But more often than not.

Here is why it matters so much.

One Of My Most Expensive Mistakes

"You are going to regret the day you met me."

That is how a staff member I hired started a conversation with me. He was right.

It is budget season in your head right now. Maybe not on paper yet, but in your head. You are starting to think about what 2027 needs to look like. The programs you want to launch. The gaps you need to fill. And if you are honest, there is probably a hire in there somewhere that you have been wanting to make for a while.

Before you post that job description, read this.

Feature or Bug? The Question That Changes Everything.

On his first visit to the church I was leading, RL Brown pulled me aside and told me something I smiled at and promptly ignored.

He and his wife Joann had just found our church. RL was 69 years old, the founder of rlbrownreports.com, and the premier economist in Arizona's housing market. Sharp, direct, rugged and about as low-maintenance as a man of his stature could be. He told me if they called Journey home, he would never want me to ask him to be an elder.

Within a year he became the first chairman of the board our new church ever had.

We led that church together for years. He taught me things about leadership, business, and life that I carry to this day. He was a gift I did not deserve and did not take for granted.